The first one.

I've read alot about blogs, and thought maybe it would be a bit more refreshing and cleansing than writing in my trusty old diary....I've just had a mammoth train journey from my hometown to the city I live in now, it took 6 hours I think, and all the way I was thinking about things I could do this year, it's a blank slate for me.
I've read a couple of things that have inspired me to be the person I want to be this month...first was the alchemist by paulo coehlo, and the second was a supplement in the Guardan today, all about free stuff. Both made me realise how ridiculously materialist I am, and everyone I know is in the same boat. I always say I want to go travelling when the time is right, but what I hadn't yet admitted to myself was that there is probably never going to be a better time than now. I'm not yet twenty, I have no job, no kids, but a lump of savings which I'm currently frittering away on possessions i don't need, and food which makes me feel fat. Ha.
My mum died a couple of years ago, the festive season has been stressfull at times...seeing everyone spending time with their families at this time, when parents mean so much, and mostly people get stressed out and perhaps don't appreciate them as much as they should. I feel heavy having spent my second christmas without my mum, who meant the world to me and was my best friend, and also without my dad, who is not dead, but sometimes may as well be. Home for two whole weeks I saw my dad (who was only half an hour away) once, for 4 hours. I don't drive, so it's all on him to make the effort. I spent christmas with my boyfriend and his mum, which was lovely, but the first time I've had a christmas without people I don't count as family or surrogate family.
Aaaanyway, that was going off on a bit of a tangent, just filling you in about me. And now I'm back home in my cosy little flat, my wonderous flatmate has put the heating on for my return, and I feel much better. I know this is home for the moment, but I'm hatching big plans for the summer, thanks to the two bits of reading I did....first thing's first, a massive post-christmas charity shop chuckout...wayhey!! Watch this space xxx